So far.

If there were words, I would use them. So far, I have been rendered speechless, full of simultaneous peace and pain. There is so much, and I am so little.

And yet.

1 Corinthians 12:9

Hungry.

 

Driving into work this afternoon, I heard a Tenth Avenue North song talking about God being there in a variety of moments, and it included this line: "The times when you're hungry and tempted to steal..."

An involuntary, "Mmm..." escaped my lips.

I'm never physically hungry. Certainly not so that I'm tempted to steal food. Praise God for that.

But I hunger in different ways. And I "steal" from places I shouldn't to try to satiate that hunger. It's becoming more and more obvious that when I need rest or refilling, I steal. I shop or browse the internet mindlessly. I obsess about baby things or organizing a closet or homeschooling or any number of other things. I worry.

All of that ends up making my issues worse. I'm hungrier.

Someday, maybe I'll learn. Maybe I'll learn to seek nourishment from where it truly comes.

Knowing and doing... Two very different things.

Help me, Lord, to seek You first and to go with you with my areas of emptiness and lack. I need You to refill me so that I can be poured out again. There are lots of people -- little and big -- who are counting on my ability to count on You.

Baby in a bath.

Lately :: 2.2

Front yard fun.

Warmer again today. More playing outside and more happy kids. I so glad it's the weekend.

Park visit.

It warmed up just enough to take some stir crazy kiddos to the park yesterday afternoon. We got Slurpees and played till the sun went away. Hands cold. Noses runny. Hearts happy.