become.

i'm doing a bible study called "when wallflowers dance" by angela thomas. it's through my small group at delana's house (tuesdays at 7 p.m. -- you should come!), and i've really enjoyed it. the only other bible study i've ever done is "stepping up" by beth moore. beth was a pretty intense teacher to start with, though i'm glad i did. angela, by contrast, is quite a bit more laid back. there isn't as much historical context (which i really love) or challenge in this study, but she is encouraging, transparent and you can't help but love her.

i was doing my study this morning -- outside on the patio in the GLORIOUS weather we're having. this week has been my favorite so far. especially day 4. the week's topic is "until it's your turn," which seems very relevant to my life right now. day 4's lesson is called "become." it's a study about how, even if it's "not my turn," in whatever arena of my life, while i'm waiting, i have an amazing opportunity to grow and become the woman i'll need to be when it is my turn.

there is a question that asked me to describe the woman i have always wanted to be, and though these things have always been in my heart, i have never really written them out. to write them out was an encouragement. i can't explain why, but it was a tangible step to voice these desires and really see how i could be working toward them as i wait for it to be my turn.

here's what i wrote to describe the woman i've always wanted to be:

"a strong one, but gentle, kind and thoughtful. i want to encourage others with words given to me by the Holy Spirt -- to be keenly aware of His leading. i want to be a refuge -- a wise, praying refuge -- for my husband and my children. i want to be someone they run to for comfort and advice, knowing i'll always offer prayers to heaven on their behalf. i want to be used of God to draw people to the kingdom through writing, hospitality and whatever else He has in mind for me."

with Him, that i will become.