the parable of the talents.

on sunday, my father-in-law preached on the parable of the talents. i'm sure you know of it, but it has to do with a story in matthew 25 that Jesus told about a master who entrusted his servants with his property. he gave each a portion, though they were unequal. the two to whom the master gave more than one talent, were diligent with their borrowed gifts and multiplied them. the one to whom the master gave one, hid his talent for fear he would lose it.

i know you've probably grown tired of posts regarding my employment situation, but the sermon struck a chord with me. i have been half-heartedly pursuing a couple avenues for the earning of income and, more importantly, using my one God-given talent. but, up to now, it hasn't really seemed like anything was working. i live in a small town, with one newspaper, which happens to be on a hiring freeze, and the other possibility (ahem! asu) is apparently not at all interested. though neither possibilty has been entirely squelched, neither one has really just appeared in my face as the answer to all my problems.

but i realized sunday, that when it comes down to it, i have really been hiding my one talent - burying it and worrying that i will lose it. i haven't been waking up each day, asking God for direction and using the talent in any way with which i can come up. i have been wallowing in the fact that i can't find any "suitable" place to use it.

that's me missing it, big time.

my talent was not made only for newspapers. or even paying employment opportunities. my talent was made by and gifted to me by the Creator of the universe. He can help me to use my talent in unfathomable ways if i would just cradle it gently in my hands, look up determinedly to the heavens and ask, "what should i do today, Lord?" when it comes down to it, HE owns my talent. and who am i to limit what He can do with His creation?

so... yesterday, i actively sought a way to use my talent. and the Lord provided a way. i was hired to freelance an article.

i don't think i could explain to you the satisfaction - the sense of purpose - i've felt today while working on the story. it was covered in prayer, and it is obvious the Lord answered. all the research worked out perfectly. everyone involved was helpful, friendly and really a downright blessing to deal with.

i know more opportunities would present themselves if i spent less time moping and more time seeking.

david said on sunday that your talent will not be increased -- it will even be taken away -- if you do not tend to it and work to improve it.

"his master replied, 'you wicked, lazy servant! so you knew that i harvest where i have not sown and gather where i have not scattered seed? well then, you should have put my money on deposit with the bankers, so that when i returned i would have received it back with interest. take the talent from him and give it to the one who has the ten talents.' for everyone who has will be given more, and he will have an abundance. whoever does not have, even what he has will be taken from him. and throw that worthless servant outside, into the darkness, where there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth." (matthew 25:26-30)

i often find myself thinking, "i am only so-so at this. there are a million people who are better than me. i'm never going to do anything great with this." this thought clashes brutally with the large-scale dream God has given me in relation to my one talent. there is no way i can accomplish that dream without growing the talent i already have.

what's more, i really don't want weeping and gnashing of teeth.

so i suppose the best option here is to have faith and invest my talent, even though it is weak and underdeveloped. if i don't, at the very best, it will stay that way. more likely, it will disappear, gone forever to one who is brave enough to use it properly.

i want to please Him. i want Him to have my life as a tool to display His ever-perfect, neverending promise of faithfulness.

make miracles in my life, Lord. increase this talent that is already Yours.

and use me to do it.