frustrated.

if you've been listening, you know i'm living with my mom. her house is as beautiful as it is large. i really am grateful to be getting to live here free while we (attempt to) save for the baby. it really is a blessing.

but all the stuff i have access to is shoved into this, oh, 15-by-15 bedroom. and basically that's clothes, a lot of papers (some of which are probably overdue bills) and various baby things i'm slowly collecting. the closets are too small for all our stuff. one of them is basically full with my jackets alone. so.. and if you know me, you aren't surprised, there is a large amount of junk on the floor. to the point where me and my fat pregnant belly can't get through the dang door because there's so much stacked up behind it. we try to put things away or make dirty clothes piles or just cram things into the bottom of the closets just to have a little walking around space. but the second landon needs a shirt for work, he pulls everything all out, and it's all over the place again. not that i blame him.. it's just... annoying. the whole thing is annoying.

then there's the bathroom. also tiny. and covered in doc's food and water dishes, our crap and a myriad of dirty clothes. i can't get into it when landon's inside with the door closed because there's no where for the door to open without slamming into him.

i don't have any of my dishes. my own kitchen. any of my furniture. any of my things. and i don't like it. most of it is in a POD-like portable storage box somewhere. and the rest is stuffed in the garage. none of the things in the garage are being used. just sitting there, collecting dust, trying to endure the heat.

and to top it off, my mom really needs to move out of this house. the money situation is not so hot, and it'd really be helpful to be out. but it's got to sell. with our living situation. and three dogs. and everyone working, going to school and trying to just exist. it sucks.

people grate on your nerves much easier when you're living with them in tight, messy living quarters without any of your own things. believe me. i know.

november cannot come soon enough. what month is it? september...

i'm tired.